When a door opens it may be time to walk through

When a "door" opens, it may be time to walk through. Or when opportunity knocks........

For several years my dad had been hospitalized. For several years he would have periodic falls (mostly from trying to get in or out of bed) but then the falls been more frequent.

One day I received a call from an EMS worker who had just left my parents' house. This was the second or third time he, himself, had answered a call to help my dad. Each time dad was okay and did not have to go to the hospital but they had to help him get back into bed (mom was not able to help him by herself). He was a bit bruised but otherwise okay. The man told me about the frequency of the calls and suggested to me that perhaps it was time my parents move to an assisted living.

I had been so resistant to this idea. I knew how my parents' felt about staying at home. They were private and proud people and did not want to leave their home.

I confess that I was also afraid of what my dad my do. I do not know if he was joking or not, as he had a weird sense of humor, but there had been times over the years that he said he would rather commit suicide than go to a home. I am a very sensitive person and I took those words to heart. I did not want to believe that he could or would ever do such a thing but the fear still lingered.

I did however, muster up the courage to bring up the subject with my parents. Like my dad, writing comes easily to me (it is a passion of mine). I am a very emotional person and I was not sure that I would be able to say everything to them unless I wrote it out first. So I did. I wrote a long letter to them explained firstly how much I love them and then the reasoning behind the suggestion.

Surprisingly my dad was open to the idea that perhaps someday that might have to move. (Notice all of the "maybe" type words). Even though they were not ready then, at least dad was open to the idea. Mom was more resistant but we did schedule a visit to a nearby assisted living home.

The visit went well but neither was ready to move yet. They still wanted to stay at their home. So that was it for then. At least the door had been opened - discussions had and a visit made - and we all walked through.

NOTE: a short time later there was a small fire at my parents' house. My mom put it out but she did not call 911. Although the fire was successfully put out, it might not have been. It easily could have reignited and then disaster would have been eminent. There would have been no way either of them would have been able to get out on their own and I am not sure help would have arrived on time. When I saw the damage that was done (the wood floor, and wall were burned - blackened - and a chair was charred. One set of curtains were destroyed) I became even more alarmed and afraid of what could have happened. It was at that moment that I realized the time had come - Mom and Dad had to move into the assisted living ASAP. They could no longer safely live at home and be left alone without someone nearby (within earshot).

I had to tell my parents that the time had come. I called that assisted living that day and surprisingly a room for the two of them had just become available. By that Wednesday, the move in.